Choosing the Right Mate–72 Days, I Don’t Think So….
In the past weeks the news–yes, I did say news–has been full of pictures and information about two celebrities who had a lavish, expensive wedding and then split in 72 days. Publicity stunt or lack to judgment???????
Thanksgiving day, a discussion arose on marriage. One couple said they married at 22 and that was much too young. Other comment came forth about age,circumstance, etc. I added I have a couple of friends who dated for years. They are attractive, intelligent and social and yet they have never found the right person. in dating each person has unique qualities and after awhile one can want all those qualities in one person and that person does not exist.
When I went home that night and began to thank God for a great day, wonderful family and friends, my mind went back to the marriage question. The Holy Spirit responded, "The person one marries should be someone whose character and nature they honor and respect."
A word picture fell into my mind. When we look past the outer core of a person, into the inner-most being, do we find love, kindness, life coming forth. Or is that person nice when it is convenient and self-absorbed most of the time. In a day and age of electronics and internet it is not unseemly to 'check someone out.'
What does their family and friends say about them? How to they treat their family, friends and oh yes, strangers? How do they treat their employees or Boss? what is their attitude toward God, life and the future? When we can honor and respect a person for 'who they are , in their heart' and love them for that, we can weather the storms of life together–especially the little annoyances that come every day.
Three of the reasons people get married are:
Passion–lust, physical attraction.
Convenience–liking the same foods, activities, sports–having things in common.
Social–long time relationship, family association, mutual friends, fitting into a social climate well.
ALL OF THOSE THINGS ARE GOOD AS LONG AS THE CHARACTER AND NATURE OF THE TWO PEOPLE OVERRIDE THOSE CONSIDERATIONS!
Then of course there are negative reasons for getting married, such as, passion without reason, rebellion against parents or just life itself , a need to be needed without boundaries, a social or career move, etc. Even these marriages can make it if the Lord is brought in, to resolve the issues (All things are possible with God) but sure is tough to start on 'shaky ground'….the odds of success and happiness are slim.
THE POINT IS, WHEN WE SEARCH OUT WHO A PERSON IS, NOT JUST WHAT THEY DO, WE WILL HAVE A GREAT PLATFORM FOR SUCCESS IN MARRIAGE AND IN LIFE!
There are no guarantees in life or marriage. But, a super important point from the Bible In the book of John, Chapter 2, speaks of Jesus and His disciples attended a wedding….clear indication, it is a good idea to have Jesus and friends of Jesus at every wedding. Jesus needs to be part of all we do, Holy Spirit leading, guiding and Father God part of our heart, so that we are able to truly love and be loved!
Pressing in and pressing on…..